Top Nine

As I count down my final week it's time to write the “things I'll miss about Paraguay” post. In no particular order...

1. Yerba. Any Paraguay travel blog probably deserves a post dedicated solely to this tea. Yerba is the loose tea leaf used to make tereré (add cold water) or mate (add hot water). It's traditionally drunk communally from a cow horn (called a guampa) using a special sieve straw (called a bombilla): add water, drink, add water, pass to the next person. Yerba in Paraguay is like coffee in the U.S., but less personal addiction than social rite – and a much more effective source of hydration on hot days. It's so pervasive, in fact, that I sometimes wonder whether the Paraguayan social structure would collapse in its absence. In Asuncion it provided an excuse to stop and chat in someone's office. On an isolated Chaco ranch it's the only reason needed to drop by and see the neighbors. Yerba is really just a catalyst. What I'm actually going to miss is a culture where social interaction is considered a necessary part of the productive work day.




2. Whoopie cushion toilet seats. It's like something you'd order from a Boy's Life magazine. Paraguayans are fond of their padded foam toilet seats, so when you sit down all the air poofs out. If you're lucky it'll make a not-quite life-like impolite bodily function noise to boot.



3. Multilingualism. Actually I don't expect to miss this for the first couple weeks. Right now I need a vacation from it. I've been listening to (and learning varying amounts of) Spanish, Guarani, German and Plautdietsch for the past three months. There's nothing like knowing only one language to make you feel like a North American.



4. Carnivorism. I'm not a strict vegetarian, but meat had become my once-a-week food in the states. That's not exactly an option in Paraguay especially on a cattle ranch, but for as much meat as I've eaten here, it's always worthwhile – no hamburger hotdish for us, most has been roasted over a fire or stewed in savory juices all morning. It's tasty, it's local, it's free-range, it's grass-fed, it's hormone-free ... why was I toying with vegetarianism?




5. Being South. Many of us believe the Earth is round, but there's something about the sun being in the north that sort of cements that. That, and the way that the wintery chill comes from the south and the north wind blows down pure heat. I also hear that drains spiral in reverse here, though I have yet to find a bathtub in which to test the matter. And then there are the stars. I'm no star buff so I was surprised to look up and realize that indeed, the constellations look totally different to me.




6. Living outside. North American houses are increasingly sealed against the elements. Paraguayan houses are anything but. As an outsider I wonder whether people here identify themselves as “outdoorsy” the way they do in the U.S. Living, cooking and eating spaces are often found outside and most houses are closed up only on the hottest, coldest or wettest days, if then. I'm still a little ambivalent, being an ashamedly huge fan of air conditioning, but I respect the philosophy that seeks ways to accommodate nature rather than trying to block it out.




7. Siesta. It's like yerba. It acknowledges what's really important in life: napping. At least in the Chaco everything is closed for three hours over noon. It's partly necessity – when the temperature recently jumped to the triple digits there was no point in being outside before 3pm – but I'll take a 2 hour siesta over a 15 minute power nap any day.




8. German radio. I remember being in Heidelberg once trying to find a radio station that played German music, but the only music I could find was in English. Now my search is ended. Every afternoon one radio station plays back to back German oldies. I think it's sort of the Lawrence Whelk era of German music, and I imagine these men with clear voices and accordions are singing about walking by the Rhine with their love on a summer's evening. I would probably find the songs hilarious if they weren't also so calming. It's perfect post-siesta music.




9. Not paying rent. Now it's back to the real world.